CAKE LOVE

OK, so like I am a Gerber free, single woman right. It's of no consequence to me right now. For the most part I've been enjoying singledom, lol. I don't have to worry about what somebody else thinks, feels, or wants. I don't have to compromise if I don't want to, check-in before midnight or anything else of the sort. Single life without kids is fun. By now you're probably wondering, "OK, so what's the problem, and what does this have to do with cake?"

I'm tired of having fun by myself! There comes a time in every one's life when it's not as much fun unless there's someone special to share the joy with. So the cat's out of the bag. I'm ready for a solid relationship. Soon she'll be rubbing up against his leg and purring for affection like, "Hello, kitty! Nada. This cat will catwalk to the windowsill & check out the dating scene because there's plenty of fish in the sea. Hmm (licking my chops)... let me preen my paws (get my nails done). Dating is a sport. Still, I'm preparing for the worst but expect the best. As I got older I got wiser and up the ante. Now, I demand my respect and want the best effort from a man. Herein where lies my problem... I've dated a few good men whom for different reasons I realized weren't necessarily right for me; but here's the proverbial one: The Nice Guys. You know, the guy next door type who offers to help you with your groceries, wash your car, and compliments your weave/hairdo even though you know its time to visit the chair. The type that makes you wish our current boyfriend was more like... minus the off-smelling cologne, sweaty palms, corny jokes, and nosy mom that is. He's Prince Charming in every away except he couldn't turn you on even if you had a switchboard built in your back! Yet, the on again off again boyfriend? Hmm, on a good day all he has to do is walk in the damned room. The sexual tension's so thick you could cut it with a knife. Talk about a 'love-jones'. Irregardless if the guy's a geek or not, if the chemistry's not there, it's just not there. I don't even think about trying to change him. However, when the sparks fly... we dare to think we've hit the luuuve jackpot and are ready to collect on our investment! Ah, ah, ah, not so fast... great chemistry doesn't necessarily mean a match made in heaven either. So, what's a girl to do? We just want a a happy medium!


OK, here's my hypothesis: Either a man has what you want & need or he doesn't. Such is life. After years of dating, trail and error, and girl talk, I'm far from an expert. Who truly is? But what I have discovered is that no matter what people say or do, we all want to have our cake and eat it too. Some things never change. Which by the way that is the silliest sounding metaphor ever. You're supposed to eat your cake! It's a celebration! And I'll tell you why. Of course the metaphor is rhetorical. Yet, in this case it literally make no sense. I'm no exception to the rule as I also want to have my cake and it eat too. What I mean is that I deserve to have & to hold what I truly desire (within reason). No one is perfect of course. Assuming one has taken that fact into account; most of us have core standards and aim to have most, if not all of them fulfilled. If ALL are fulfilled that's cause for a celebration. Now w.t.f.? Who says we can't eat the cake?

Ladies, we desire "good man" qualities but we also desire the "bad boy" ones too. Yes, they have qualities too or else we wouldn't have stuck around. By definition what we really want is a man who possesses their combined qualities. The Nice guy who loves, respects, protects and spoils us, but the Bad boy who by no means will put up with our unnecessary bull 'ish, can stand up to his mother, break you off nice and proper after a hard day at the office, and can handle his own in a bar fight. Unnecessary bullshit? Yes! Let's be real. Even the best of us has her occasional "unnecessary bullshit". As a woman it comes along with the territory and mainly due to our hormones. We can barely put up with each other for extended periods of time much less thinking a man should continue to tolerate a lot of catty melodramaticism. A real man wouldn't be caught dead engaging in that much less allow his woman to henpeck him ball-less. If he did we wouldn't respect him because we couldn't. Overall, we desire men who will defend and support his women YET has a mind of his own; he's not at all nervous to let us know when he doesn't agree. Men who are patient YET protective; he won't hesitate to make heads roll when & if the need arises. Men who take care of his BUT won't allow you to play him for the fool either. A man who has compassion AND confidence, his ego makes women want him and men want to be him. A man who is an attentive & gentle, but confident and spontaneous; he knows what you like and won't think twice about freaking you in the bathroom while guests are in the next room watching Everybody Loves Raymond! He's a real man because most everything about him is "gangsta" YET he is also a gentlemen. Ladies I give you the "G"! I swear, the G-string was invented by them [lmao]. Remember, I said we all want to have our cake & eat it too. Well, who said they wanted a woman in the street and a freak in the bed? The best of both worlds. It had to have been a G to coin that phrase. A "G" is confident, sexy, and knows what he wants. That's what any sensible woman wants in a man, whether she realizes it or not. I'll be the first to admit that I didn't. Not until I accidentally found one. I had the wrong idea. I thought if I wanted good looks, great sex and an unbiased opinion I ultimately wind up with a jerk. On the contrary, if I wanted friendship, love & support I'd wind up with a spineless geek. It was never that black & white. By definition, I don't want a Nice guy or a Bad boy. I desire a well-rounded man and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Men/women, we all want well-rounded partners/relationships. That's not asking too much or being self-indulgent. We're simply treating ourselves to what we deserve. So go on girl! Have your cake AND eat it too. I know I will.

Brag Tag:

Happy and want the world to know? What's "the icing on the cake" in your relationship? Tell us what added perk(s) did you discover about your mate?

EMINEM & DRE ARE BACK IN THE LAB!

For those of you out there like me who've been missing Slim Shady please stand up. Eminem is the only Caucasian rap artist given honorable mention in the hip hop/rap music industry, He has worked alongside the biggest names in the industry, including rap mogul Tupac, Dr. Dre, T.I. Nas, Jay-Z, 50 cent, Snoop Dogg, and The Game. Not to mention, dubbed "The Best Rapper Alive" by Vibe Magazine. Talk about your bragger's rights! In my opinion, T.I. is the best rapper [alive] but Em has is own unique style to bring to the table. His diverse appeal and polarity in the rap game makes him iconic in his own right and a lyrical asset on any track. As a fan, I miss his cynical as Stewie lyrics, emotional, crack a mirror with words metaphors and rock star-esque energy!

Seasoned artists know better than to saturate the market. Even All-Stars have to sit the bench from time to time, allowing others some shine while they regroup; leaving fans to grow anxious for their return. However, this All-Star has been sitting the bench for quite some time. It's been four years since his last album (Encore) and some disgruntled fans are wondering w.t.f is up. In his defense, he has been raising little Haley (Miley Cyrus style), battling against drug addiction, and gritting his teeth thru his rocky road marriage with wife Kim. Furthermore, over the Christmas holiday Eminem was hospitalized due to complications from pneumonia. Fortunately, he has since been released from the Detroit hospital and is reportedly doing just fine!

From source Gil Kaufman of Blogburger.com, "Of course, Em was never completely out of the loop. In the midst of any previous drama he managed to drop a few jewels, including a cameo appearance on T.I vs T.I.P (Touchdown - Track 12 ), a recent freestyle, “I’m Having a Relapse” dropped in October and last week a song called “Crack a Bottle,” which is believed to have been produced by Dre, was being advertised on DJs Big Mike and Neptune’s 4th Quarter Pressure Part 2 mixtape. "Me and Dre are back in the lab like the old days, man,” Eminem reportedly said in an e-mail to Billboard. “Just him banging away on tracks and me getting that little spark that makes me write to it. I don’t have chemistry like that with anyone else as far as producers go — not even close. Dre will end up producing the majority of the tracks on Relapse. We are up to our old mischievous ways. … Let’s just leave it at that." There isn't a release date for the long awaited LP but Em confirmed that Dre pushed back his own long overdue album (Detox) to help him with his album! As far as Relapse Em goes on to say, “It wasn’t close to finished, and it even has me doing guide vocals for Dre as a suggestion of how he could lay his verses down,” he told Billboard. “It’s like someone catches you peeping in your window before you got the Spider Man costume all zipped up! Nobody is supposed to see that. We are gonna finish it up, though, and get it out there how it’s supposed to be.”

You ain't gotta lie to kick it...

Reportedly, rapper/producer Swizz Beats apparently lied to MTV about collaborating with Em on a song Swizz referred to as Stan Part2 (supposedly about a kid who drove his car off a cliff). Our boy Em confirmed that there is no such collaboration and dismissed the alleged project; calling it corny. What Em has been doing is working on his newly released and best-selling autobiography “The Way I Am” — written with journalist Sacha Jenkins while recording the Relapse album. In addition to the delayed Dre album, another record that was pushed back is 50 Cent’s Before I Self Destruct,. This project is getting back on track, according to Em, and slated for release February 4, 2009. Eminem also, has a couple of tracks on it and in his words, "It’s sick.” Hmm, sounds juicy! So, we've caught up Eminem and much to our satisfaction he's still very much in the rap game and will not be going anywhere, anytime soon! Hey, I'll be the first head in line when his new album drops. See ya at Sam Goody, lol.

POLITICAL EVOLUTION

The big day is finally here: The Inauguration of President-Elect Barack Obama... I can hear Wilson Pickett echo thru my conscience - "A Change Gon' Come". Well, I'm happy to report that it has come. Barack Obama will be sworn in and pleasantly seated in the Oval-Office today. This "wish-upon-star" style hope puts even Disney to shame. It is a dream come, fireworks will explode (behind the Washington monument that is), and viewers could nearly expect Tinkerbell to come fluttering in from behind the Washington Monument and dink her tink-wand on their television screens!

The Exodus of 2009: It is cold as ever but thousand upon thousands flocked to witness history come true. I received a off colour text message yesterday making light of a blaring irony; it read, "Do you know why it's so cold outside? Because folks said it would be a cold day in hell before a black man becomes president!" I laughed with a sense of pride, joy, and most of all triumph. My chest sticks out at the sight of the Obama family. It is a beautiful thing. As those of us make our way to D.C. to confirm the reality of this dream with our own to eyes , let's be mindful that this is just the beginning. It's up to us to keep hope alive. Today is a new day for the world let alone America. We our in a position to rebuild our global reputation, the bridges between one another, honor our ancestors and much more.